时间:2020年01月24日 23:02:30

Having recently celebrated our first wedding anniversary, I wanted to learn how my husband and I could help immunize ourselves from future strains and stresses on our marriage. Since we inherit most of our conceptions of marriage from our families, peers and social groups, I was drawn to Tara Parker-Pope#39;s scientific exploration of relationships in For Better: The Science of a Good Marriage. After her 17-year marriage ended, the New York Times Well Blog columnist Parker-Pope sought an objective, fact-based understanding of what went wrong in her own relationship. Whether you think of your significant other as your soul mate, life partner, husband or wife, Parker-Pope offers insights to help you strengthen your most profound relationship in life.最近我和丈夫刚刚庆祝了第一个结婚周年纪念日,我想学习一下我们如何才能避免未来婚姻中的磕磕绊绊。由于我们大多数有关婚姻的观点都继承自我们家人、同辈朋友和社会群体,因此当我最近读到塔拉·帕克·蒲伯的《期待更好:幸福婚姻的科学》一书时,我被书中对婚姻关系的科学探索所吸引。在结束了17年的婚姻之后,这位《纽约时报》的客专栏作家开始寻找对于自身恋爱关系中的问题的客观有事实根据的理解。不论你对你的灵魂伴侣、生活搭档还是丈夫或妻子,这些重要的另一半怎么看,帕克·蒲伯所提供的深刻见解都能帮助你增强生活中最深远的那层关系。If you are in a new and thriving marriage, a fulfilling partnership of many years, or evaluating whether you want to take the next step, Parker-Pope#39;s tips from ;For Better; will help you maintain, booster or rekindle the relationship bliss:不论你是正享受甜蜜的新婚,还是经营了多年的幸福婚姻,抑或正在盘算是否要进行下一步,那么帕克·蒲伯在本书中提供的小贴士会帮助你维持、增进或者重新点燃你的幸福爱情。1.Celebrate the small stuff.1.庆祝点滴小事。;It#39;s not enough that your partner knows that you take pride in her or her accomplishments. You have to show it. Making a fuss over the small, good things that happen every day can boost the health of your marriage.;“如果你的伴侣只知道你为她或者她的才能而骄傲,这还不够。你必须将此表现出来。多挖掘每天发生的微小的美好的事情,这会促进婚姻的健康发展。”2.Learn how to fight productively.2.学会如何有效地争吵。;The key to fighting productively is to recognize when a disagreement is going in the wrong direction and to take steps to calm things down and repair rifts.;“有效争吵的关键在于,认识到争论是在何时偏离了方向,并且采取措施让事情平静下来并修复分歧。”3.Silence is not golden.3.沉默并非是金。;By staying quiet and avoiding conflict when things bothered them, they had missed important opportunities to cultivate and grow their relationship.;“如果出现困扰时仍保持安静、避免冲突,那么他们就失去了滋养感情和增进感情的重要机会。”4.Don#39;t put negative thoughts into the universe.4.不要总是有消极想法。;Men and women who had pondered thoughts of divorce in 1980 were nine times more likely to have gotten divorced by the end of the study.;“在1980年开始的一项研究中,曾有过离婚想法的男女,到研究结束时离婚的可能性是其他人的9倍。”5.Plan together.5.一起计划。;Couples who planned a baby#39;s arrival or who were equally joyous at becoming parents were far more likely to maintain their marital happiness or even enjoy an increase after the baby was born.;“计划生育宝宝或是同样满足于为人父母的夫妻更易保持婚姻幸福,有的在宝宝出生后婚姻幸福感得到了提升。”6.Maintain a circle of friends and support.6.维持朋友圈和给予持。;Strong friendships outside the marriage can take the pressure off your relationship, help you work things out away from your spouse, and ultimately protect your marriage from unnecessary stress and discord.;“婚姻之外牢固的友谊能减轻你因爱情所承受的压力,帮助你在不依靠伴侣的情况下解决问题,最终保护你的婚姻免受不必要的压力与不和。”7.Overcompensate for mistakes.7.过度补偿错误。;Do marriage math. Even when you make a mistake, tell yourself that you#39;re going to do at least five positive things for your spouse to make up for it, and then do them. And don#39;t wait until you bicker to turn on the charm. Nice gestures and comments go far in a marriage, they are easy to do, and they will help insulate your marriage from being damaged by the inevitable bad days.;“做一下这道关于婚姻的数学题。当你犯了错误,告诉自己你要对伴侣做至少5件积极的事情来补偿,然后照做。不要等到你们发生了口角才来展现你的魅力。优美的姿态和言语在婚姻中十分奏效,这很容易做到,它们还有助于使你的婚姻免遭不可避免的坏情绪日子的侵害。”8.Set the marriage bar high.8.设高婚姻的门槛。;Husbands and wives who hold their partners to a reasonably high standard have better marriages. If you expect a better, more satisfying relationship, you improve your chances of having one.;“将伴侣的档次提升到合理高度的夫妻会有更幸福的婚姻。如果你期望有一段更美好、更令自己满意的婚姻关系,那么你就要提升拥有它的可能性。”9.Give it a break.9.给婚姻适当的空间。;Sometimes, improving your marriage means giving it a break. Increasing your connections with family, friends and society is good for your marriage.;“有时候,改善婚姻质量意味着给它一些空间。增加你跟家人、朋友和社会的联系对婚姻有好处。”10.Be aware of your body language.10.注意你的肢体语言。;Eye rolling is a painfully obvious sign of contempt, and it#39;s a powerful predictor that your relationship is in serious trouble.;“转眼珠的动作非常明显地表现出了蔑视,这强有力地预示了你的婚姻关系陷入了大麻烦。” /201207/192633

长相好看的人比起长相平庸的同事工资待遇要高A new book by an economics professor at the University of Texas-Austin reveals what the world of advertising has known for decades - that beauty sells.德克萨斯大学奥斯汀分校的一位经济学教授最近出版新书,书中揭示的似乎是广告宣传界已经流传已久广为人知的真理:那就是美貌能带来商业效益。But Daniel S. Hamermesh also shows that being attractive pays - with good looking employees enjoying more perks and higher pay packets than their plainer colleagues.不过丹尼尔;哈默迈什教授的研究可不止如此,他还发现长得好看收入也高:长相好看的人比起长相平庸的同事工资待遇要高,享受的特殊待遇也多。Professor Hamermesh has studied what he refers to as the economics of beauty for about 20 years.哈默迈什教授把这叫做美貌经济学,他已经潜心研究此领域有20年之久。In his book Beauty Pays, published by Princeton University Press, he claims good looking people enjoyed perks beyond their pay - such as party invites, business travel and office privileges - while less attractive workers are overlooked and can often be victims of discrimination.在他的新书《美貌带来报酬》中,他认为长相好看的人在工资收入之外,享受的特殊待遇也要多,包括聚会邀请,商务旅游和办公室特权。相比之下,长相没那么吸引人的同事们通常会被忽视成为外貌歧视的受害者。该书已由普林斯顿大学出版。Attractive people are more likely to be happier, earn more money, get a bank loan (with a lower interest rate) and marry equally good looking partners.容貌好看的人更快乐,赚得更多,可以拿到贷款(利率还低),跟容貌同样不错的伴侣结婚的可能性也更大。As a result, attractive employees are more productive, leading to higher sales and potentially higher profit for themselves or the company they work for.因此,长相好看的职员工作效率也更高,带来更高的销售额,同样也会为自己或公司带来更高的利润。Less cut and dried is what constitutes attractiveness. Far from being merely in the eye of the beholder, Professor Hamermesh points to a few subconscious factors - such as the symmetry of the face, facial expression and popularity factors (if the person looks like someone popular or famous).上面的这些似乎有些老生常谈吧,不过哈默迈什教授还总结了一些吸引力的组成因素。觉得某个人有魅力可远不止情人眼里出西施这么简单,他指出还有一些潜意识因素:脸型的对称,面部表情和名人效应(看起来像某个名人)。In his book, Professor Hamermesh estimated that attractive people earned on average about 145,000 more in a lifetime than those with below-average looks.教授在书中估计,长相好看的人一生平均要比长相低于平均水平的人收入高出14.5万英镑。A beautiful woman would earn four per cent more, and handsome men three per cent more, than their plain counterparts.比起长相平平的同事,美貌的女性收入高出4%,帅气的男性收入则高出3%。When the professor#39;s research became widely known in the early 1990s, he came in for some criticism - namely from comedian Jay Leno, who asked why someone like Dallas businessman and presidential candidate Ross Perot earned more than someone like actor Rob Lowe?哈默迈什教授的研究自20世纪90年代早期起就广泛引起关注,不过也有一些批评的声音:特别是喜剧演员杰;雷诺(小编注:美国N电视台《今夜脱口秀》节目主持人),他就质疑为什么罗斯;佩洛特,这位达拉斯小牛队前老板和两届总统候选人, 赚得要比帅哥级演员罗伯;洛多呢?But Professor Hamermesh brushed this off, being ed in the Sydney Morning Herald as saying: #39;We don#39;t talk about individuals; we talk about the average good-looking person and the average bad-looking person. There are always outliers.#39;不过哈默迈什教授没有接受这种质疑,他曾对《悉尼先驱晨报》表示:;我们谈论的不是单独的个人,我们的讨论对象是平均长相好看和平均长相难看的人。总是会有例外的。; Of course education and work experience were important factors in earnings, but Professor Hamermesh said his new book, based on his research, showed that a person#39;s looks were impossible to ignore.教授基于多年的研究在新书中表示,教育背景和工作经历当然是影响我们收入的重要因素,但是个人长相的影响也无法忽略。 /201111/161525

Many brides ask me, "I do not understand the dress, what kind of dress I wear the most appropriate?" To answer the question to consider the physical characteristics of each bride, color, hobbies, and details of Party Dresses occasions and more. Is worth noting that to establish their own style is very important. Identify their most unique temperament, and the right way to wear out your inner charm with beautiful wedding to be expressed, so that true inner beauty of appearance with the combination, will be able to show your unique charm. In defining the style, you must understand it in fact covers many aspects. Elegant, art, leisure and romantic, these words on behalf of occasions, mood, personality, and for such time and place the clothing type of overall impression. Each style has its own adaptation of the time, place, and we must not set their own style in a model, we must know the style of dress for each occasion. The dress is very important to local conditions. 许多新娘问我:“我不太会挑裙子,那种裙子最适合我呢?”回答这个问题,要考虑到每个新娘的身形特征、肤色、偏好、不同场合聚会的着衣细节等等。这些都不如建立自己的个人风格来的更有意义这一点非常重要。找出自己最独一无二的气质,再用正确的穿衣方式通过美丽的饰将自己的内在品质展现出来,让内在美和外在美结合,就能展示出你最独特的光。确定风格时,你必须认识到这实际上覆盖了许多方面。优雅、艺术、文艺以及浪漫,这些词代表着场合、情绪、个性、以及在特定的时间和地点装总体印象的类型。每一种风格的饰都有其特定的时间,场合,我们不能将他们的不同特征模型化,我们必须知道针对不同场合的穿衣风格。着装对一定的场合是非常重要的。 /201104/132600

结婚誓词是婚礼上最重要的部分,发自肺腑的寥寥数语是两人对婚姻和一辈子的坚定承诺。让我们一起来聆听那些洗练而凝重的结婚誓词…… We are gathered here today in the sight of God, and in the face of this company, to join together (Groom's Name) and (Bride's Name) in holy matrimony; which is an honorable estate, instituted of God, since the first man and the first woman walked on the earth. Therefore; it is not to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but reverently and soberly. Into this holy estate these two persons present come now to be joined. If any one can show just cause why they may not be lawfully joined together, let them speak now or forever hold their peace. 今天,我们在上帝的注视下聚集于此,并且在这群人的面前,来见(新郎名)和(新娘名)的神圣婚礼。这是个光荣的时刻,是自从亚当和夏娃在地上行走以来上帝便创立的时刻。因此,它不是鲁莽而又欠缺考虑的,而是虔诚而又严肃的。现在,有两位新人即将在这个神圣的婚礼中结合到一起。如果有任何人能够有正当的理由明他们的结合不是合法的,请现在提出来或请永远保持沉默。 I require and charge you both that if either of you know any impediment why you may not be lawfully joined together in matrimony, you confess it now. Be assured that if any persons are joined together otherwise than as God's word allows, their marriage is not lawful. 牧师:我要求并且告诫你们两个,如果你们当中的任何一人知道你们在这场神圣的婚礼中的结合也许不是合法的,你必须现在立刻坦白。请务必知道一点:没有上帝的允许,任何人的结婚都不是合法的。 (Groom's Name) Do you take (Bride's Name) for your lawful wedded wife, to live together after God's ordinance, in the holy estate of matrimony? Will you love, honor, comfort, and cherish her from this day forward, forsaking all others, keeping only unto her for as long as you both shall live? (新郎名)你愿意在这个神圣的婚礼中接受(新娘名)作为你合法的妻子,一起生活在上帝的指引下吗?你愿意从今以后爱着她,尊敬她,安慰她,关爱她并且在你们的有生之年不另作他想,忠诚对待她吗? (Bride's Name), do you take (Groom's Name) for your lawful wedded husband, to live together after God's ordinance, in the holy estate of matrimony? Will you love, honor, comfort, and cherish him from this day forward, forsaking all others, keeping only unto him for as long as you both shall live? (新娘名)你愿意在这个神圣的婚礼中接受(新郎名)作为你合法的丈夫,一起生活在上帝的指引下吗?你愿意从今以后爱着他,尊敬他,安慰他,关爱他并且在你们的有生之年不另作他想,忠诚对待他吗? I (Groom's Name) take thee (Bride's Name) to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love, honor, and cherish, 'til death do us part, according to God's holy ordinance; and there to I plight thee my troth. 我(新郎名)接受你(新娘名)成为我的合法妻子,从今以后永远拥有你,无论环境是好是坏,是富贵是贫贱,是健康是疾病,我都会爱你,尊敬你并且珍惜你,直到死亡将我们分开。我向上帝宣誓,并向他保我对你的神圣誓言。 I (Bride's Name) take thee (Groom's Name) to be my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love, honor, and cherish, 'til death do us part, according to God's holy ordinance; and there to I plight thee my troth. 我(新娘名)接受你(新郎名)成为我的合法丈夫,从今以后永远拥有你,无论环境是好是坏,是富贵是贫贱,是健康是疾病,我都会爱你,尊敬你并且珍惜你,直到死亡将我们分开。我向上帝宣誓,并向他保我对你的神圣誓言。 Father, we pray for all married persons, that they may continue to give, be able to forgive, and experience more and more of the joy of the Lord with each passing day. And especially for (Groom's Name) and (Bride's Name), now beginning their married life together, that they may have pine assistance, the constant support of friends, and a long life with good health. May your fullest blessing come upon (Bride's Name) and her husband (Groom's Name), from this day forward, for ever and ever, Amen. 主啊,我们为所有已婚夫妇祈祷,他们能够继续彼此付出,能够继续彼此原谅,并且每天都能经历越来越多的您的快乐。特别是(新郎名)和(新娘名),一起开始 他们的新婚生活,愿他们能够得到您的帮助,永远得到朋友们的持,健康的度过一生。愿您全部的祝福带给(新郎名)和(新娘名),祝福他们直到永远。阿门。 May Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, always be at the center of the new lives you are now starting to build together, that you may know the ways of true love and kindness. May the Lord bless you both all the days of your lives and fill you with his joy. Amen. 愿我们万能的救世主耶稣,永远出现在你们现在所造就的新生活的中间,让你们知道真爱的道路。愿主祝福你们活着的每一天并且让你们得到他的快乐。阿门。 /201110/157819

Many of us spend the bulk of our day peering at computer screens. Reading this article means there#39;s a good chance you#39;re looking at one right now.许多人每天都要花费很多时间在电脑屏幕前。比如读这篇文章的时候你就正在看着屏幕。But does looking at a computer screen damage your eyes? Brisbane optometry professor Nathan Efron does not consider computer screens ;harmful; to our eyes.看电脑屏幕真的会伤害我们的视力吗?布里斯班眼科教授Nathan Efron并不这样认为。But he admits if you use one a lot, you increase your risk of becoming slightly more short-sighted –where your eyes focus well only on close objects while more distant objects appear blurred. This is especially the case for children and young adults, whose eyes are still developing.但他承认如果你经常使用电脑屏幕,会增加你患近视的风险。因为你的眼睛经常盯着近处的物体,远处的物体自然就看不清楚了。这对于儿童和年轻人尤为明显,因为他们的眼睛还没有发育成熟。In the shorter term, prolonged viewing of a computer screen can make any slight existing vision defects more noticeable. It can also give you what is sometimes known as ;computer vision syndrome; – eye strain, headaches, gritty eyes and blurry vision. But this is only temporary and can be minimised by:简而言之,一直盯着电脑屏幕可以在短期内使视力明显下降。有时候还会让你出现“电脑眼综合症”:眼睛酸痛、头疼、异物感、模糊。但这些都是暂时的,可以用以下方法缓解:Adjusting the screen display so the contrast is high and the brightness feels comfortable.调整你的显示器的亮度和对比度,让你的眼睛觉得舒为准。Having lighting that does not produce glare on the screen.不要让屏幕上出现附近灯光的反光。Giving your eyes regular rests from looking at the screen (The Optometrists Association of Australia recommends you do this for five to ten minutes every one to two hours of computer use. It#39;s a good time to make phone calls or do other tasks.)让你的眼睛定期休息。(澳大利亚眼科协会建议每一到两小时至少休息五到十分钟。你可以利用这个时间打个电话或做些别的事情。) /201206/187528

文章编辑: 58频道